Relinquishing control over something is probably one of the hardest things to do. In our culture today, we want to be in control of every detail of our lives: our job, how much we make, ability to provide, who we marry, how many kids we have, what our kids look like or what gender they are, what church we go to, what our pastor preaches on, how we feel about the sermon or the worship...the list goes on. We want control over our lives.
The hardest reality to come to terms with is the fact that until we give up control of our lives, every part, we won’t be able to fully realize the amazing plans God has for us, and they are SO much better than our own plans. Nothing has illustrated this more for me than my time planning Quest.
Quest is my baby: a 3 day high school retreat that Crown College has every spring. It includes a speaker, a band, worship, seminars, fun activities, an UnTalent show....and I direct it, plan it, stress over it, etc.
When I first started in this job, I was freaking out in November or so because we didn’t have a band yet for Quest. My co-worker and I were searching high and low, thinking we would find the perfect one, but then things wouldn’t work out. One night, I just prayed to God through tears, “God, I give up. Whatever band you want...this thing is yours, not mine.”
We booked our band the next day. They were fantastic. God had a plan. I thought I did, but it wasn’t His.
Now, it is happening again. The way I want this year’s Quest to happen isn’t working out. This past weekend I was reminded that it is okay that it isn’t working out; God’s plans are better. The disappointment is fleeting; God’s plan will be a million times better than mine.
I’ve been listening to a new band called Casting Pearls a lot lately. One of their songs, “Alone”, is one that hits me again and again, no matter how many times I listen to it:
I’m letting go of all that I know
I’m holding on to you alone
I lay it all down, down here at your feet
I want you alone, you alone
How many of really let go of everything, control of our entire life, so that we can know our God alone? I continue to remind myself everyday to let go of certain things, leave them at the cross and let God handle it. But it’s so hard; I always want to pick them back up again!
Quest, financial situations, the future, relationships, dreams...I need to let go of it all and just get closer to my Savior. All things will be revealed in their time.
Eph 3:20-21 “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout generations, for ever and ever! Amen.”